Self Help
He used to feel such powerful things, such wonderful things.
He used to walk his dog at dawn and just stare at the purple flowers that opened up in welcoming the new day.
Stripes of red, orange, yellow on a giant blue and white canvas filled the sky, and he looked at it, almost entranced, ensnared by the complex elegance of it all.
​
He used to think about everything. This was maybe his bane and burden to carry. Slowly there was no living, no experiencing the moment, the right now, but only the thought of now and the wonderments of repercussions and consequences, entangled by branches of 'what ifs' and 'whys' and 'dos' and 'donts' and everything was pretty much non cohesive in the worst way, not beautifully abstract but woefully confusing and misleading with no conclusion or an enlightened point of view at the end.
At first he thought it was a positive thing to think and analyze. He assumed it will make him a better person, smarter, yet his head was not organized and order did not reside there, only thick fog, clouding his mind to absolute disarray.
Entertainment was his escape as he tried to swallow as much content as he could; three or four books in an interchanging reading fest, while a movie played in the background, clearing the fog briefly, all of it, just enough to realize it was a distraction of epic proportions, the comforting solace it provided was soon to disintegrate, leaving him emotionally depleted and mentally naked, his thoughts again creeping in, thickening the fog once more.
​
What must one do? Go outside, interact, strengthen bonds with loved ones, meet new people, go on a self-discovery quest, seclude yourself in a cave in Peru, practice meditation, learn to block your mind, learn how to think about nothing, don’t move! Stay perfectly still, stagnant, feel the blood coursing through, listen to your heartbeat that indicates your body is in working order, breathe the air and fill your lungs till they're overflowing! Overflowing with this air, this oxygen, the sweet sweet nectar of life. Open your eyes and look at this magnificent ball you're in, thoughts of insignificance be damned! You are here, at this moment, a wonderful, beautiful human, an infinitely complex machine. You desire and long and feel and you want to live fully and you are talented and gifted and motivated and comprised of many, many good traits and attributes and you are a bottomless pit of intricate, deep thoughts and ideas. You are infinite. You are kind hearted and good and you should not take that for granted. The ability to take joy from a purple flower's scent and soaking the air around you is not to be taken lightly in this unbelievably crazy modern time. Embrace it. Hold it with all your worth. Gently care for it and make it grow for it is the only thing that's real and meaningful. This is your life's fuel.
